Fixing Good CYOA

[Corenat Rovarnus]

C wins. Better Call Paul!

You know just the person to call: Paul Hoodman, Esquire – Attorney at Law.
You’ve seen his cheesy TV commercials hundreds of times, and if there’s any truth to them he’s a top notch lawyer who can get people out of the stickiest situations.

You pick up the phone and dial the number. A bored sounding woman picks up, probably his secretary.
“You’ve reached Paul Hoodman & Associates. Mr. Hoodman will be with you in a moment, please hold.”

Hold music starts playing, which you recognize as Paul’s signature jingle, a lo-fi guitar beat that cuts off abruptly before repeating. You can almost imagine a 3D model of his face zooming in and out in your mind.

After a short wait the music stops and you hear a man’s voice, a bit rough but very friendly in tone. “This is Paul speaking, what can I do for you?”

You explain your situation, and Paul is very understanding. “Jesus, that’s rough buddy. And you’ve got cancer where? Oh, your wife must be devastated.”

Actually, you haven’t told your wife or anyone else about your diagnosis yet. But that’s not important right now.

“Don’t you worry Mr. Black,” Paul says, “I can help you solve your money troubles. All we need to do is file a lawsuit against someone who wronged you in the past. Once we win the case, the court will order them to pay out the big bucks to you in damages. Not to toot my own horn, but I’ve won suits for my clients worth millions of dollars. Millions!”

“The only catch is, it might take some time to get that payout. I know time is a concern for you, so if you’re just looking to make a quick buck, I can hook you up with some odd jobs instead. More like gigs, really. Short time commitment, big payoff. So what’s it going to be?”

A. lawsuit sounds good Paul, but who can I sue?
B. Give me an odd job!